Couples Therapy

The problem is not that you fight, but that you do not fight well.

You and your partner continuously have communication issues. You find yourselves having the same arguments with no resolution and get nervous to talk about the “off-limits” topics.

Confronting those off-limit topics usually leads to arguments.

Arguments have escalated and turned into the blame game.

Off-Limits

You wish the two of you could find common ground on so many topics, but you consistently argue over finances, cultural differences, and household responsibilities.

It’s not just present circumstances that have both of you on edge either.

Addictions, past partners, family secrets, infidelity, or seeking validation outside of the relationship have lead to insecurities, jealousy and mistrust, unrealistic expectations, and intimacy problems.

The pile of unresolved issues keeps growing.

When you try to “handle it…”

Inevitably, you and your partner will experience seasons of sadness, stress, frustrations, and fear. When this happens, an uptick in tension, misunderstandings, and mismatched needs/desires are evident.

You’ll end up yelling, shutting down, and going into avoidance and denial. You’ll start to blame and criticize each other, make passive-aggressive comments, and even fall into emotional manipulation.

Both of you lose sight of the main goal of the relationship, which is to mutually be fully known and fully loved.

Envision your relationship like cooking a meal together.

You each bring different ingredients, flavors, and techniques to the table.

Sometimes, these ingredients complement each other well, resulting in a delicious meal. Sometimes, there may be clashes in timing, styles, and desired outcomes.

Couples can have the right intention, ingredients, and method for their relationship, but one touchy subject and emotions explode all over the place.

These moments require creativity, flexibility, and curiosity to find a recipe that satisfies both palates.

Learning to fight well is one of the first things we do in couples therapy.

When two people come together and blend their separate lives into one relationship, a lot of ‘ingredients’ don’t necessarily mix perfectly together.

Issues may pop up early on or later down the line when more relationships (kids) have been added to the family system.

Together, we explore how your different personalities, upbringings, beliefs, cultures, and conflict styles create the dynamic of your relationship.

Let’s get cooking.

In therapy, you and your partner will work on understanding one another better.

The two of you will learn to resolve tension and conflict, create healthier patterns and habits for your relationship, and communicate with clarity, kindness, and empathy.

Our work together will help you better understand not only yourself, your triggers, and your narratives, but also your partner’s.

How I help.

My couples’ sessions focus on helping you and your partner become a team again and tackle the problem instead of each other.

In couples therapy, we work on many different challenges.

From improving communication issues by learning to identify your triggers and express them in helpful ways, to refining conflict resolution skills and creating a healthy way to fight and repair.

You’ll learn to process and navigate big life transitions, along with growing in empathy, understanding, and emotional depth.

What you can look forward to by working with me.

You and your partner will experience connection and intimacy by sharing thoughts, feelings, and experiences.

Both of you will feel understood and accepted by each other, cultivating a deep emotional connection.

Companionship will grow between you as you learn to rely on each other for encouragement, empathy, help, support, and comfort during good and challenging times, creating closeness and safety.

You and your partner can grow together when you choose couples therapy.

Align your values and direction through shared vision, values, and beliefs.

Have a sense of unity, purpose, and mutual respect. Experience growth and development by cultivating a healthy relationship.

Overcome obstacles, and become the best versions of yourselves. Learn to develop more understanding and empathy for each other.

Let’s figure it out together.

You each already have what it takes to make this relationship work. With your effort and energy, and my expertise in healthy relationships, we will work together to smooth out the clumpy inconsistencies and create a balanced, strong connection filled with chemistry, respect, and championship.

Take a step toward healing and reach out today at (818) 835-0005.